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A Man
Named Bubba
There was a man named Bubba and Bubba knew EVERYONE in the whole world!!!
Once when Bubba got a new job, Bubba says to his new boss, "Boss, I know everyone in
the whole world!" His boss doesn't believe him, so he says "No you do not know
everyone in the whole world" but Bubba says "Yes I do!" so Bubba's boss
says "Well prove it!" then Bubba says "Pick someone... and I know
them!"
Well Bubba's boss thinks for a minute and then comes up with a name. "Tom Selleck! I
bet you don't know Tom Selleck!" Bubba says "Tom Selleck! Tom and I were in boy
scouts together when we were kids!" but Bubba's boss says "No you weren't!"
then Bubba says "Yes we were" so they fly to Hollywood and drive up to Tom
Selleck's house. Bubba knocks on the door and Tom Selleck answers and Bubba goes
"Tom!!" and Tom goes "Bubba!" and they hug and catch up for 30 minutes
and Bubba's boss can't believe it.
But then he thinks "Well that could happen, it's just one person," so he tells
Bubba and Bubba says "OK, pick somebody else!" This time Bubba's boss has
someone in mind! "The president, Bill Clinton! You don't know President Bill
Clinton!" but Bubba says "Oh yes I do! Bill and I were on debate team together
in college!" Bubba's boss says "No you weren't!" and Bubba says "Yes
we were!" so they fly to Washington and they catch with the President at a press
conference. They work their way through the crowd until Bubba get's close enough to catch
Clinton's eye and waves "Bill!" and the President waves "Bubba" and
after the press conference they hug and catch up for 30 mintutes and Bubba's boss is
stunned-- he can't believe it.
But then he thinks "Well that's just two people in one country-- that doesn't mean he
knows everyone in the whole world!" so he tells Bubba and Bubba says "OK, pick
someone out of the world spectrum and I know them!" And Bubba's boss knows just who
to pick so he says "The Pope! You do not know the Pope!" and Bubba says
"The Pope! The Pope BAPTISED me!" and Bubba's boss says "No, he
didn't!" and Bubba says "Yes he did!" so they fly to Rome where the Pope is
giving Mass in front of hundreds of thousands of people. They work their way through the
crowd-- without much luck-- so Bubba says "Boss, we're never gonna get there together
through all these people so I tell you what-- I'll work my way up there and when I do,
I'll give you a sign that shows you I know the Pope!" and he leaves.
Well Bubba's boss waits and waits and waits and just when he's about to give up, he sees
the Pope come out onto the balcony and right there beside him is Bubba! Shortly
afterwards, Bubba's boss passes out.
Bubba comes back and finds his boss passed out and he fans him and says "Boss! Boss!
Wake up!" and when his boss comes to, he asks "Boss what happened?!!"
Bubba's boss looks at Bubba and says "OK, I can see Tom Selleck. I can see Bill
Clinton... hell, I can even take the Pope! But when somebody standing next to me asks
'Who's that up there with Bubba?' that's a little more than I can take!
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